Daddy Day Care

We are used to the pattern by now. We have been subjected to it for more than twenty years so we don’t complain about it, we don’t make the usual jokes about it, we don’t even notice it anymore, and he doesn’t seem to mind either. It’s not a career fault nor is it a talent slump. No, no. I think this is turning into some sort of a strategy plan now. What? You have no idea what I’m talking about? Well, let me try to give you the clues to solve the puzzle: The movie on hand is “Daddy Day Care”, a fluffy family film that seems to be intended so much for kids, that it actually made me feel guilty to be spending my time in the theater amidst the cries of babies and the yelling of little children that were entering my ears in Dolby Digital Surround Sound and they weren’t coming from the movie either. No, what was coming from the movie was even much worse: it was the endless burping and farting sounds of little kids that were inserted into the soundtrack so loudly, that it feels like the producers were trying to cover the fact that they couldn’t come up with one single intelligent joke. That being left aside, the film itself is so formulaic in its execution that I wonder if it could have been written automatically by one of those screenwriting programs. The father loses his job, opens a day care center (A day care center opened by a man, ha ha), goes through comical troubles (Kid craps all over the toilet, ha ha), goes through “serious” troubles (A competing day care center that would put Hitler to shame sabotages the daddy day care, boo hoo) and in the end… Well, I won’t reveal what happens in the end but if you think this one ends in some sort of a tragedy, what planet are you living on?

Acting/Characters: Eddie Murphy (A ha!! The most important clue of the puzzle) is a funny guy. He is funny when he imitates an action star. He is funny when he makes fun of Mr. T and he is hilarious when he plays an obnoxious guy named Buddy Love. But he “is not” funny when he tries to be sweet around kids. He falls flat, he seems to be uncomfortable and he looks like he is dying to say the “F”-word. Jeff Garlin is the typical comic relief fat dude (Since when did an Eddie Murphy movie need a comic relief?) who falls to the ground every five seconds, followed by a loud thump (Because he’s a fat guy, get it?), oh and he also screams occasionally. And Steve Zahn, with his quirky “Star Trek” geek character does what he does best: Making crappy comedies watchable. Like he did with “Saving Silverman” and “National Security”, he emulates such a hilarious vibe that it is impossible not to like him. God bless you, buddy (When will he star in his own movie?).

Directing: Steve Carr’s first directing job was “The Next Friday”. Need I say more? Seriously, it looks like all he did was to put a whole bunch of kids and Eddie Murphy together and waited for something funny to happen. A year later they found the footage. Nothing funny happened.

The Movie: So what the hell was I talking about at the beginning of the review? I was talking about Eddie Murphy’s career of course. This guy has formulated a pattern for himself where he does terrible films for a couple of years and makes a good comeback in between those years. He did “Trading Places” and did crap until “Coming to America”. He flew from dung to dung until “The Nutty Professor” then came “Bowfinger” three years after. And now we have “I Spy”, “The Adventures of Pluto Nash” and now, “Daddy Day Care”. It’s been long enough so my guess is the next Eddie Murphy film will be a blast. Because as a loyal fan, I am losing my confidence. This has been the driest spell yet. Come on man!!!

Starring: Eddie Murphy, Angelica Huston, Steve Zahn, Regina Hall, Jeff Garlin…

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