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| My Life Without Me |
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  (8/10)
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Runtime: 103 |
| Public Rating: 6.89 (46 votes) |
Director: Isabel Coixet |
MPAA Rating:  |
| Genre: Drama |
Year: 2003 |
| Writer(s): Isabel Coixet |
| Distributor: Sony Pictures Classics |
| Reviewed by: Le Apprenti |
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How do you spend the rest of your life knowing that you only have a few months left to live? To be precise, how has it been done on screen? Terminally-ill Winona Ryder had a romantic affair with Richard Gere in Autumn in New York. Renee Zellweger sacrificed her profession to care for cancer-stricken mother Meryl Streep in One True Thing; the formula was repeated that year by Hollywood in Stepmom when another cancer-stricken mother Susan Sarandon and stepmother Julia Roberts clashed their personalities on screen. At least Roberts' previous film Dying Young reversed the gender of the doomed-to-die victim, a male blood cancer patient where she cared and fell in love with.
In My Life Without Me, 23-year-old mother Ann (Sarah Polley) - after discovering that she has 2 months left to live - does two things none of the ill-stricken women did. First, she tells no one about her condition, not her mother (Deborah Harry), her husband Don (Scott Speedman), her kids Penny and Patsy, or her bosom co-worker Laurie (Amanda Plummer). Next, she resolves to live the remaining months of her life with a fierce resolution. She prepares a "Things to do before I die" list, which include items such as telling her kids she loves them several times a day, recording birthday greetings for each of their years until they are 18, speaking her mind, and visiting her father who is in prison.
During this time, Ann feels that her life is filled with regrets and unfulfilled ambitions. A life that has been burdened financially and physically by the trappings of raising a family before turning 18. She, Scott and their kids live in a trailer located in her mother's backyard. Despite their close proximity, she and her mother are emotionally distant on account of Ann's jailbird father among other things. It is not surprising that a few of her "Things to do before I die" items are self-centered endeavors - make a man fall in love with her, and have sexual relations with him to find out what it is like.
Besides the secrecy of her death, the most interesting aspect about My Life Without Me is the dying protagonist's determination to do whatever she wants with no regard of consequences. When she has a discreet affair with a man named Lee (Mark Ruffalo), her concern is only in enjoying the moments of intimate pleasure. That his heart will eventually be broken and his feelings hurt does not bother her. (One cannot help but question Lee's naivety for plunging into an affair with a married woman.) However, her heart is still for Scott and her kids, so that she befriends neighbor Ann (Leonor Watling) to subtly prepare her to fill her own shoes when the time comes.
Adapted from the short story Pretending the Bed is a Raft by Nanci Kincaid, the film puts Sarah Polley on the spotlight as the sole lead character. Her performance is deep yet insightful, and her narrative poignant. Ann's personality, including her penchant for sarcasm, her emotional duress, her various behavorial patterns, and her inner liberation from thoughts of repercussions or consequences, are fully fleshed out. Her beauty, hidden because of the trials of raising a family, is sensually highlighted by the strength of her character, not by facial or cinematic cosmetics. Polley is helped in great part by writer-director Isabel Coixet. Coixet's narration borrows greatly from co-producer Pedro Almodovar, who recently won an Academy Award for Talk To Her. Like Almodovar, she downplays any pre-conceived perceptions of right and wrong in her treatment of Ann, presenting the character as she is without judgment.
Although Lee's character in relation to Ann is quite a stretch, perhaps the only weak point of the story is the cause of Ann's plight. It would not hurt (no pun intended) to develop its character more than just a one-time diagnosis. Although mentioned frequently as a plot device and Polley's acts of lethargy acknowledges its presence, her bodily behavior does not bear the marks of someone suffering from cancer.
My Life Without Me is the Spaniard-based El Deseo's first English language film, and one that is based from a non-Spaniard literary source. In spite of those distinctions, it outdoes most Western-based studios in its frank narrative without taking itself too seriously. It gives you a reason to live like you have never lived before, even when time is short.
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